For the month of March we are doing a new series completely dedicated to something you probably don’t consider at all on your wedding day, but it can have the most substantial impact on you and your wedding party as a whole. This illusive creature I am referring to is Mindset. Now, this concept is nothing new. In fact the Arbinger Institute (the company Jason and I received all of our training through involving mindset) has been around since the 1970’s. In this series we are looking at how our understanding of mindset can make your day go as seamlessly and calmly as possible.
What is the first thing that comes to your mind when we say the word mindset? Some people say it is how people interact with one another, feel, or how they act in response towards a situation. All of these responses are not exactly wrong but they don’t take into account the entire picture. Mindset, in its most simplest terms, is our perception or how we see other other people. Think of it as a lens of how we see our work colleagues, family, relationships, bosses, and any other person you basically come into contact or become involved with. Mindset is the foundation of how we perceive others and shapes how we interact with them.
The “illusive” part of mindset is its ability to change in an instant. According to Arbinger, mindset can shift between two paradigms: inward and outward mindset. Inward mindset is where only your own personal goals and objectives matter, without consideration for the impact or the results of their behavior on others. Have you seen this mindset at weddings? Maybe some people throw tantrums, or maybe have unreasonable expectations and like to complain ALOT, or people say they want to help and then disappear when you need them. In an Outward Mindset, you are focused on the objectives and results of your wedding as a whole. You actively seek to be helpful, responsible, and make a real impact. Think of that person that really helped a wedding day or was just there to listen? What impact did they have on the wedding?
So this is our start on our mindset journey. Over the next few weeks we will look at how these mindsets will impact your behavior and, ultimately, your wedding day. So to kick us off I recommend you do two things:
Very important note, mindset is a journey and not a destination. Achieving an outward mindset is not something you will ever reach permanently. The goal is to become self aware so that you recognize when your mindset goes inward, and then know how to shift it back to outward.